Stupid tongue
by therichnobody
Summary: Training sessions can be rough for Sasuke, but no pain, no gain. He just wishes that he could experience things a kid has at his age. Well maybe a certain someone can help him out. oneshot SasuXOro I was bored. just fixed title, I can't spell


Feel like doing a yaoi, shonen-ai, gayness, whichever you may call it. Don't know why I feel like doing this, but work with me, I have serious no-idea-issues right now...

Disclaimer: If you think I own Naruto, you must be OUT CHO' MIND!

"How can I start...Your form was abysmal, aim dreadful, and you couldn't even catch me." a bored out of his mind Orochimaru said to an exhausted Sasuke. The two just got through another training session where Sasuke was supposed to capture the Snake lord and place a talisman in his pocket, but every chance he had, Orochimaru would strertch out of the way, even mockin him to the point where he'd slap him with his tongue. Sasuke of course, was getting nowhere fast in his training and hated the fact that he was tired from only 16 hour-long training sessions, 5 off from his usual per day. "You are slacking, and aren't learninig from your mistakes. There is an inner conflict, is it not Suckske?"

_He's making fun of my name, AGAIN..._

"It's Sasuke, and it's none of your business."

"It's something," he hissed, suddenly taking a swipe at Sasuke, who narrowly dodged it, "and you need to get over it if you plan on surviving. Tell me, are you starting to miss the Leaf village?" he finished, going for a leg sweep and succeeding.

"Tch," he replied spitting out dirt, "I could care less about that place. There is only one thing on mind, and I will achieve it." Then, using his speed, quickly applied the Phoenix Flare jutsu and actually hitting his target, too bad the target was a clone. "Damn it, I missed."

"But Suckske, you couldn't hit the broad side of a mountain!" Orochimaru yelled, causing Sasuke to look back towards the yell only to fall in a ditch that was behind him. Spitting and wiping the mud from his face, he regained his bearings, not trying to let his guard down but was again thrown off guard when he felt something slimy slide down the back of his neck. Turning around only got him in Orochimaru's hold, hindering his movement greatly.

"Arrrgh! Let me go!" Sasuke tried everything, but he couldn't get out of the Sound nin's grasp.

"Not until you tell me what's wrong. Trust me, I care about my...'followers'. So tell me, spill your guts, or I'll do that for you." he whispered in a deadly tone, chilling Sasuke all the way down his spine. "Now."

"Fine, you want me to tell you, I'll tell you. But," he paused, taking a deep breath before starting again, "you'll think I'm a weakling for even thinking about it."

"No I won't."

"Yeah well, it's just...When I do confront my brother, I always had this sinking feeling that he'll kill me before I even get to live...I mean, I may seem like I don't care about life, but I do. I want to revive the Uchiha clan, which means starting a family, having kids...becoming a grandfather..."

The Snake lord was stunned by Sasuke's words. "My, I didn't know you had a spot in your dark, revenge-riddled heart fro that sort of thing."

"...I won't even get to experience my first kiss..." 

"Oh, I can fix that."

And then before he could grasp the situation, Sasuke found his lips being joined by Orochimaru's. He didn't know what was happening, all he knew was: Stop it.

But Orochimaru didn't stop. He intensified the kiss, pulling Sasuke in closer, running his hands down Sasuke's back, actually going into his pants. Sasuke tried to scream and especially tried to prevent that Sound nin's wretched tounge from entering his mouth. Clenching his teeth, trying to push him off, kicking, none of this worked. It was like a boa constrictor capturing and devouring the rat, and Sasuke was the rat. _Just keep the tongue out, please, just keep. The. Tongue. Out._ was going through his mind, but he broke in.

And what a pleasant feeling it was.

The gentle carresing of that snake-like tongue, ever twisting, turning, roaming his own. Even the taste of it was great. Orochimaru pulled him in more, loosing his hold to let Sasuke hold him. Placing his arms around the Sound nin's neck, bracing himself so they wouldn't fall over, and loving the whole thing. In what seemed like an endless dream of sucking at each other's taste buds, Sasuke needed air. Fast. He tried to pull himself off, but not before feeling a new sensation. Something he hasn't felt before, not in this occasion anyway. And then finally, he stopped. Sasuke jumped back and fell on his behind, gasping for air. Orochimaru just stepped back and stared at the aroused Uchiha. "Finally hit pueberty, I see."

"What are you talking about?" Confused, he looked down to where Orochimaru was pointing only seeing that his pants were wet and a certain 'appendage' was erect. Hastily closing his legs and turning his back on the laughing Snake lord he yelled "It's your fault!" and can't help the fact that he was blushing. "You brought it on yourself. How was your first kiss?"

"... ... ..."

"You know you liked it, no denying it." Orochimaru said as he placed his hand on the embarrassed ninja's shoulder, "Were you trying to pull my tongue out or what?"

"SHUT UP!"

"I guess I really can call you 'Suckske' now!"

"Shut your face before I"-

"Plug it up with your"-

"RAAARRR!!!"

And that's why all of the Sound nin found Orochimaru covered in red paint and chained up in a bull pen, rapidily getting stampeded.

Stupid ain't it. But haven't you noticed that in ALL of my yaois, at least one of the participants are bored?

Rewiew please!


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